This morning on the walk to school, my youngest was providing me with a list of things that make her feel happy. When our dog curls up exactly in the middle of his pillow, watching someone throw a pot on a wheel, when the condiments in the fridge door happen to line up according to height... The list goes on, but each of her ideas came at me as a small sparkling epiphany. I feel joy for those mundane and random bits of eye candy too! I love staring at rows of things. I love collections and patterns. Order in the chaos, math out of madness, an over developed sense of aesthetics, call it what you will, I love sharing tendencies with my children.
Like a chicken with it's head cut off...
Despite the graphic imagery of this expression, or perhaps because of it, I find this idiom really relatable. With to much on my plate I tend to run in aimless frantic circles and engage in small unsatisfying fragments of larger tasks. My thoughts blur into senseless strings of words, shrill mantras that sing at me through the day and awaken me at 2 am. It takes purposeful stern self guidance, me holding my own hand and patting myself repeatedly on my own shoulder to sew my head back on and focus on my feet. I struggle to take small deliberate steps with my eyes on a distant horizon instead of the whirling minutiae I am wading through.
buddha's shoes
In Kamakura we a visited a great bronze Buddha (Daibutsu in Japan) nearly 14 meters tall. The Buddha was built in 1252. He was originally constructed inside a temple but the wooden structure was washed away in a tsunami, leaving Buddha out in the elements. The size of the statue is astounding. The age of this massive artwork was unfathomable. It was one of the most beautiful human made things I think I've ever seen, but what made me cry and laugh and feel a little connected to the ancient giant figure were the gigantic pair of woven sandals waiting for him in the small building to his left. When no one is looking I imagine he slips them on to stroll the hills behind him.
manholes across japan
Japan was awash in tiny detail work that seemed solely directed at beautifying spaces. Curved and decorated roof lines, hanging lanterns and flags void of advertisement, patiently sculpted trees, elaborate public signage, and (my personal favorite) gorgeous manhole covers. Here are a few beauties.
Art Forms
I am so proud and astounded as I witness my daughters develop their creator selves; my oldest with a pen and pencil, my younger with any instrument she can get her hands on. Their relatively uncluttered mental storage units seem to allow for this ultra fast, uber flexible learning curve. I see changes and development that takes me months, happen for them in moments.
I am stacks of rocks that must be lugged and wrestled aside to carve slow new paths. They are new trickling rushing streams across sand, forming patterns almost instantaneously, then washing over and forming anew. My daughters give me that courage to try new things. Because of their fearless endeavors at personal growth I feel I must at least attempt piano lessons, grant writing, korean cooking... Here's to moving many more rocks to build many more paths.
a theory I'm working on...
I learned about Quantum Entanglement sometime last year. Entanglement occurs when photons interact physically. Just what physical interaction implies in the world of quantum physics is beyond my grasp but for example, a laser beam can be fired through a certain kind of crystal that can cause a photon to be split in two. The two entangled particles remain affected by the actions of one another regardless of how far apart they are. Einstein dubbed the phenomenon "spooky action at a distance".
When I consider this phenomenon it makes me curious. When I visit magical places, when I spend time with magical people, if the light is shining just right through the little rain drops on the maple leaf or the window pane, if I happen to be standing just so in the path of light, could particles of me be split and left behind, entangling me with places and people in a magical mystical sounding way that is actually hard quantum physics? I sure hope so.
Rabbit did not so much love his Human Doll as depend on her for comfort, compliments, and someone to bounce ideas off of.